#include virtual="/ssi/header.html" January 21, 2001 Experiencing Ecstasy By Matthew Klam How Bad It Is to Be 20 Years Old The pill was white and smelled like No-Doz. Although it had come to us in the mail inside a tennis ball, it was legal then, fresh from a lab in Texas. No rumors, no culture surrounding it. We took it on a whim, on blind faith — because it was Saturday and there was nothing better to do. It was late afternoon, warm for November in New Hampshire. Starting that day in 1984, and until May 1986, I ate Ecstasy, once or sometimes twice a month. During that same time I realized that the plan I'd made for my life (I was 20 years old) was useless. I kind of woke up. I didn't start wearing flowers in my hair, but I got more excited to live, made a new plan that felt freer — a plan that sent me in the right direction. And I still wonder what the drug had to do w...