Onion, Inc. Sites The Onion The A.V. Club ClickHole StarWipe Onion Studios Headlines Search Top Headlines Report: 1 in 5 NYC Adults Suffers Mental Health Issues Chili’s Customer Who Just Finished Ribs Platter Given Complimentary Hose-Down Man Searching For Part Of Chicken Tender Thin Enough To Fit Into Plastic Dipping Sauce Cup CHESTER, PA—Slowly rotating the deep-fried strip of white meat to consider every possible angle from which it could be dunked, local man Brian Oakley is, according to sources, currently searching for a part of his chicken tender thin enough to fit into the plastic dipping sauce cup. Defensive Tackle’s Innocence Shattered By Play-Action Pass EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ—Saying the eye-opening experience has forever altered his wo...