Update story metadata Change the story’s title and subtitle as needed Darin Ross 4 min read Close Publish changes Request story Sign in / Sign up Darin Ross on Aug 30, 2013 4 min Next story Next story The author chose to make this story unlisted, which means only people with a link can see it. Are you sure you want to share it? Yes, show me sharing options Share on Twitter Share on Facebook Share by email Have you ever been to Earth? On Earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but l...